out with the old, in with the new

Happy New Year, everyone! May 2006 be a bountiful year for all of us. Do continue (or start) living a God-centered life for it is through this that all blessings shall come your way.

Screw lame resoultions.. hurrah for mind-boggling spontaneity! From here on end, rid yourself of the trifling negativity that may have beset you and embrace the prosperity in which your soul deserves. Time to forget and completely discard of trivialities of days past.

"Memories can be painful. To forget may be a blessing!" -- Sing's sidekick (Kung Fu Hustle)

Mrs. Santa, would you want a candle too?

Indeed, t'is the season to be jolly... and broke! But still happy nevertheless. Christmas is my fave season (as is everybody else's). Thank God fruitcakes are a thing of the past! I am so sick of seeing a mound of fruitcakes in our ref (nobody really eats them). Candles are the new fruitcakes though. Our living room now has a flurry of sundry scents ranging from cinnamon to vanilla. Also, t'is the season to be gahdamn sick! I've been sneezing like hell since yesterday and am close to blowing my brains out that if the tissue roll I'm holding right now can talk... it would have cursed me in several languages already.

Be that as it may, I still love Christmas (despite the flu and the nauseating scents of candles which, by the way, are the all-new recycled gifts to give).

Maligayang Pasko, mga kaibigan ko.

a trinket of yore

This morning before leaving, I suddenly remebered that I drafted an entry last weekend. And true to form, my pea-sized memory has once again got the best of me. Share ko lang.

Kaya kwento na...

So last weekend, I was in the supposed cool place that is Greenbelt. My friends and I spotted 2 guys who had this light, greyish eye make-up in the "eyebags area". Consequently, they all poked fun at these guys. So here's the thing, am I such a dumb faggot to find it sooo f'in HOT?! I mean... they weren't good-looking and all but I thought that the whole "I'm-a-straight-guy-wearing-eye-makeup" thing's just smoldering with appeal.

I wanted to rip my clothes off and pounce on them. But then again, who'd want to do that in Greenbelt?! Definitely not you. You shrimpy catholic schoolgirl you..

Ohmybloodyhormones! What's with you, brain? Stop making such a ruckus up there will you?!

Look Ma, I'm talking about Advertising!

What could be better than a brand trashing itself?!

Advertising has always tackled on the beauty of this and the greatness of that. Perfect shots and oh-so-marvelous branding, not to mention clever ideas that would make you go "Gawd, that's pure genius!" Well... Director Spike Jonze of the Being John Malkovich fame might make you utter that line without having to experience all those frilly surmises that have somehow set the standards of what should and shouldn't be. He's the one behind the Anti-Gap ad which I just looourve! But truth be told, this Anti-Gap ad was made for Gap (ang weird noh?!). Maybe Gap wanted the campaign to be touted as Anti-Gap or something in order to catch the market's attention. The point of the whole ad is that there will be a "new" Gap. Yeah... whatever.

Its still hella funny for me!

You can watch Spike Jonze's version here. But syempre, Gap came up with their own version.


* * * * *


I'm a full-fledged nerd, geek or whatever suits your taste. I'm actually getting giddy over the SILENT HILL movie (slated to be released next year)! I get a kick out of watching zombie movies and the like. Well... it's NOT really a zombie movie per se but its somewhere near that at least.

That f'in game made me want to scream "Mommy!" but was the most fun I've ever played (and I'm not even that fond of PS games). If by fun you mean spine-chilling, then that's it.

block 3

I just had to take the Dante's Inferno Test AGAIN. I've taken it for the third time now and I still get excited about the result! Not that it's something to look forward to, in say 60 or 70 years, but just the same... it's fun. Anyway, I was vanquished to Purgatory which is way better than the last result I got haha =) I'm so babaw, naaaliw na ako sa mga ganito.

Purgatory -- You have escaped damnation and made it to Purgatory, a place where the dew of repentance washes off the stain of sin and girds the spirit with humility. Through contrition, confession, and satisfaction by works of righteousness, you must make your way up the mountain. As the sins are cleansed from your soul, you will be illuminated by the Sun of Divine Grace, and you will join other souls, smiling and happy, upon the summit of this mountain. Before long you will know the joys of Paradise as you ascend to the ethereal realm of Heaven.

The Dante's Inferno Test has sent you to Purgatory!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:

Level	Score
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)	Very High
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)	Low
Level 2 (Lustful)	Low
Level 3 (Gluttonous)	Moderate
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)	Moderate
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)	High
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)	Very Low
Level 7 (Violent)	Low
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)	High
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)	Very Low

Take the Dante's Inferno Hell Test

lamenting on whatnot

Isn't it sad that the only time we get to realize the error of our ways is when we see it in other people? It has to be mirrored in such a way that you'd be a fool not to notice it. At length you'd get sick of seeing too much of yourself in this person or that preson. Eveything is in shambles of sorts and your life is a stark contrast of reality. Muffled sounds inside you, if listened to, are nothing but cries of disgust. You'd eventually turn to the one Guider who has been there and will always be there no matter how dark the sky may seem. And you'd be left with nothing to hold on to but His Hand. Though there are times wherein I would question why He had to inculcate in us sadness, disappointment and the like. But then, I'd always revert to the same old explanation every human being wuold whisper to their soul since time immemorial. And with that, everything would fall into place.

I know everything in this entry seems quite vague and to some degree, weird, as i intend to keep mum about things from now on. I am trying my darnest best to avoid past mistakes by divulging too much. I have suffered a great many ordeals and as much as I would want to share it and let it off my chest, I've come to a point wherein sharing doesn't necessarily transcend satisfaction. The pain would always be there anyway so you might as well shut the hell up and wait for it to pass. As is with eveyrthing else.

Bakit ba parang ang drama ko ngayon?! Must be the weather, its giving me spells of sadness.

useless entry #32950

I learned something new as of late: Dogs hate cigarette smoke.

I was smoking my lungs out in our porch. There I was happily minding my own beeswax when my dog suddenly came up to me. My dog, which is a male Lhasa Apso, was obviously horny. He kept on humping my leg! His frenzied state didn't stop there, he went on to hump the chair and the plants and some more plants, it was driving me crazy!! I love my dog to bits but his humping was annoying the hell out of me.

So I blew him some smoke. He sneezed (well I think it was a sneeze... I assumed that's what a dog's sneeze would sound), rubbed his nose with his paw and scampered away. I saw him rear his head and he just stared at me. Then he left again.

I do tend to be a tad of a sadist. Sometimes.

hic.burp.snort.


* * * * *


Oh dear movie god, how great is thee! For you have blessed us with great, wonderful, fantabulous, awesome (err.. you do get the point, right?!) movies. It's been so long since I last spent a 120 freakin' pesos to watch a movie because alas, I have been adhering to piracy (sorry about that... but 80 pesos IS 80 PESOS). I will watch not one but three or maybe even five! Ooooohhhh the scads of celluloid to be watched...


* * * * *


Answering these dang surveys are just sooo much fun... not!

My friend inveigled me into answering this survey which I, eventually, enjoyed. Sometimes, it's fun to play around notions concerning the most perplexing emotion God's little dolls can have: L.O.V.E. (Oooohh the toothache-inducing fervor that it is) coz there's always a gray area. Y'know.. the maybe's and the what if's. But I, against my better judgement, answered the survey in a way I felt most fitting. So forgive the overwhelming sarcasm of my answers. harhar.

I DID have fun though. Surveys are one of my cheap thrills.


1.Who's your love? aside from family, god and friends???
- family, God and friends. harhar.


2. Do you believe in the saying that goes "First love never
dies."
- Love doesn't die. It just packs its bags and leaves with a
one-way ticket.


3.How do you know when it's really love?
- I dunno.. maybe when pasta isn't the next best thing
anymore.


4.Do you know when someone likes you?
- No... but I WOULD KNOW if someone licks me.


5.Is love lovelier the second time around?
- why? was it during the first?? (insert sly smile here)


6.What' s your opinion about the saying LOVE IS BLIND?
- It's just an explanation people come up with for something
that should be beautifully inexplicable.


7.Will you do everything for the person you love?
- all encompassing, baby!


8.Will you ever fall in love with your best friend?
- if and when I do turn lesbo, I... stil wouldn't! Gawd, these
questions are awful.... i'm guessing some dike did this . tsk.
tsk. some more tsk.


9.What's your type of girl/boy?
- two words: JUDE LAW (sans the nanny-shagging impulse)


10.Do you express your feelings openly?
- serious answer about to be delivered: No, I don't.


11.What do you dislike in a girl/boy?
- if he's too much like me... that spells trouble.


12.Who's your crush?
- mothaeffer! CRUSH??!! I don't crush on people anymore. I
already gave up on that lameness.


13.Do you have a bf/gf?
- zzzingle.


14. Is it possible for you to fall in love with an older man or
woman?
- older means wiser. wiser means lover.


15. Eh younger?
- nope, older's the only way to go.


16.How hard is a break-up?
- so hard I wanna cry and pluck my eyes out and scream
and punch my own stomach and spill my bloody innards
from my nosetrills... REALLY NOW. Ask a dumb question
and you'll get an answer as dumb as what I've just said. ;-p


17.Are you a heartbreaker?
- au contraire..


18.What do you do after a break-up?
- buy a really good detergent coz my bleeding heart's
making a stain on my blouse.


19.Do you swear never to fall in love again?
- No but I'll make a pact right now. I SWEAR never to
answer a survey like this one again. deal? deal!


20.What's the greatest lesson/s you've learned
regarding love?
- Love is a four-letter word.. and so is like and hate and
food and yuck and shit and fuck and post and ciox..

necesito amor

Umpteen serenity, sheer bliss and healthy (pollution-free) air are mine for the taking! I'm hitting the beach this weekend with my college girlfriends. I can't wait to press my soles against white, powdery sand.

Love's it, bebeeh!


* * * * *


Sometimes, I just want to bitch slap myself.

I'm too honest for my own good. I seriously am. Gawd... when will you stop yakking, mouth?! I have a whole entry in mind for this one but I'm just too lazy right now to jot it down. The procrastinating goddess in me has ruled over. So 'till the next entry then.

harumpf!

Anyone reading my blog would have already noticed by now that I've been posting a couple of images/works in my entries. The thing is, I personally am more amused whenever I read blogs that have pictures in it which is why I keep posting these stuff. They serve as... i dunno... an eye candy?

SO ANYWAY...

Got me some moolah yesterday! I was giddy as can be but alas, such delight didn't last long. Why? Because I blew a considerable amount of it on a 3-hour-4-figure splurge, that's why! So much for being close-fisted. Although, in an effort to look at it in a more positive way, I am doubly glad with every purchase I made. I gave a whole new meaning to the phrase "Reward Yourself." Fuckin' arse, man! I was planning on spending it on more "important stuff" but yesterday "important stuff" suddenly consisted of bikinis, earrings, food and a skirt. From an inquisitive skinflint to a wayward spendthrift, that shift of mood came with too high a price. Well at least for me it did coz after all, I am superdupermega kuripot.

I made this entry for the sole purpose of having it as a reminder of how distraught I can get after spending hard-earned money on useless - albeit wonderful - things.


* * * * *


There's this new place here in Marikina which is a cut above the rest. It's a nice mall. A small one but still considerably nice as compared to the others malls found on the fringes of suburbia.

Everything's a-ok, save for the parking lot booth attendant (did I get that job description right? coz it sure is a mouthful.) So anyway, one afternoon, we went there (btw, the name of the place is Marquinton) and decided to just hang out and waste a perfectly good afternoon on cigarettes and coffee. (Oh... did I say waste? I meant spend. hardeharhar.) So we were entering the parking lot when the booth attendant suddenly asked us:

"Mag papark po kayo?"

I was like... what the fuck?! We were in a car about to enter a parking lot... what else can we possibly do there?! I wanted to laugh at her and say "HEEELLLOOOO, alangan namang dalhin namin tong kotse sa loob, diba?!" I wanted to throw a sarcastic remark at her but I decided against it. I was too baffled to even smirk.

Anyway, after hearing "the stupidest question ever" we all trooped over to yellow cab instead coz to choose between Pizza or some over-priced drink... hands down, PIZZA!!!

how long is long?

Busy, I was. Busy, I am. Busy, I wil be.

I'm covered in a blanket of doubt and it's killing me to know that it is still something I might take comfort in. So life may not be going according to plan (as usual) but it would be too foolish of me to brazen out so as a result, I came up with my own maxim. I'm quite vague though as to what drove me to adhere to such thinking.

Okay, I'll let you in on what's brewing inside my puny little mind. Since I've been getting big, fat F's in the love department, I've decided to set my sights on what lies on the other side of the fence. Meaning, I'll start following what God so cleverly situated on top of my measly human body. To be ruled by love is idealistic and to be ruled by sense is realistic. Needless to say, I now fall under the latter. A realist in every sense of the word. No more crabby pffts.

The heart feeds on what the brain does not desire and so inversely.

Aaaaand so in conclusion... money makes the world go round and love is just a cover-up (a despicable notion, you might say. Well for idealists, it most certainly is but I'm a realist remember?!).

Be that as it may, I'll eventually revert to my former mien. Just not now. Well at least not for the time being.


* * * * *


I've come across a few blogs that would post this "20 random things about blah blah blah" and thought of adopting the same, bleak thing. Although I whittled it down to ten coz twenty is just absolute overkill for me. Now how immensely self-absorbed can I get, ey?! I'm gonna continue on nonetheless...

1. Rogue is my favorite X-men.
2. One of my feet is pike (not telling which one) which makes it all the
more harder for me to walk in heels.
3. I do NOT know how to ride a bike.
4. My first ever offense/violation in school was cutting classes. I was grade 3.
5. I loathe wearing corporate attires unless need be.
6. Dark chocolate makes me horny (and thus, my aphrodisiac revealed).
7. I saw "something" while I was in Baguio with my blockmates during the 18th PAC. Consequently, I was reduced to a mumbling, fumbling scaredy-cat after which I just brushed it off as a hallucination so as to rid my thoughts of it. Although up to now, I'm still positive it was a lady in black.
8. Kristine Hermosa is the Filipino actor I despise most. She is sooo gah-damn pacute, it's annoying the hell out of me!
9. I find Ferdinand Marcos' reign the best so far, save for the last few years leading up to the decadence of his presidency (sure I wasn't alive yet but hey... hisotry books don't lie.)
10. I enjoy watching movies alone.

blood of a bitch

Sketching bores me (but then again, everything is one big drab for me; so much so that nothing strikes my fancy anymore). No offense to all you advocates of lead, charcoal and the like. It seems that the greys and the blacks and the whites were causing a glaring discomfiture inside me. Right now though, I'm a slave to pop art.

Moving on...

I swear, if someone asks me again about my recently failed relationship, temporarily derailed career path and unclear travel plans... I'm gonna f'in burst! We can talk about something else, y'know. I mean, give me a break, I feel like I'm under the microscope. People observing and asking all the time what will I do, what do I feel. yadayada. blahblahblah.

Quick tip about little ol' me, I hate being asked questions about my life. I dunno... maybe coz I'm a private person or maybe because I also do not know the answers to all these questions that are being thrown at me. Honestly, it takes a lot for me to spill my bloody guts to just about everyone and anyone I get to be inches away from. Even my friends aren't fully aware of how I am and what I feel. Privacy is one thing I treasure so much (next to a lot of things maybe but still, it's very important to me).

As much as possible, I try to avoid having spurts of vexation but there are times when the barkbark in me rules over.

So anyway...

It's hollow's eve, what oh what will I do?! Watch my friend's band play or stay at home and scare myself silly with MGB's halloween special?

I think I'll go with the latter.

Yoda rocks!

Well hello there, blogging world.

You ought to be very pleased with me coz I have been religiously updating this blog (at least for the past 3 days, I have).

I'm quite the crank right now. And since most of my friends are wrapped up in a chapter in my life that I have completely lost interest in (save for a few ideas on revenge - oh, I'm bad alright), I've, yet again, resorted to pouring it out to anonymous pffts.

So anyway, confused is me (ha! Yoda-ish lingo rocks!) coz something inside me is about to walk off with the notion that everything's way better in New York. How can it not be?! It's one of the best cities in the world and the melting pot of all cultures. But then, there's that strident and imposing voice that says it's not all this and that.

Tsk, tsk... decisions, decisions.

On a lighter note, I'm rediscovering lost ardor. My pleasurable mornings with it has brought out the curios girlie in me. That is, until our electric bill comes and my mom would learn about my love affair with Adobe and consequently, I would cease to become its mistress. And everything would be reduced to drab, abysmal sketches on impassive drudgery. Whittled down to the dullness of monochromatic curves (Fuckin' arse man! my doodles are so elementary, i have to f'in practice some more).





Ooil pastels didn't delight me much although I did find it amusing to see different colors under my nails. I prefer the high-tech coloring book kind of thing coz it makes me feel like a kid again. But alas, no more broken crayons this time. Sayang, I've always had that certain sadistic pleasure pa nman in feeling them break.



And what am I supposed to do 'till December? Mop around and ponder on the enormity of what lies ahead of me or continue abusing my perfectly good eyesight on something that is of utmost interest to me?

I've done pretty much a lot to appease the hand that feeds me by sending my resume (again) to prospective companies coz maybe (just maybe), in the short span of time I have 'till December, something might come along, something that I would be keen on taking a stab at. But definitely not in accounts, thankyouverymuch.

Oh look! You read until the end of this entry. How great is you (Yoda really rocks!)

'nuff said.